Does He Really Care about Apples?

I have struggled getting back into my writing groove since the holidays.  So much tends to keep me preoccupied with other things... like life.  Homeschooling my children, grocery shopping, budgeting and seeing how much money I can't spend.

It was a little disconcerting this morning.  I went to the store with my two helpers and I had a list of items I "had" to get for food and was under orders by my Beloved to spend no more than $50.  I thought No problem.  My list isnt' that long.  The thing is... I failed to think of how many of each item I was going to purchase.  After buying three orange juices (since my boys guzzle it down so quickly), two cereals, two canned mushrooms, a bag of chocolate chips (for those cookies we're going to make), two bags of Doritos, two packages of butter, salad dressing, two loaves of bread and some fishy crackers for the boys, I had used up all my allotted money.

I had picked out some yarn for the new afghan I wanted to make (three skeins at $2.88 each) and a booklet of some patterns since I'm still new to the world of crotcheting and need some help.  I put those back since they weren't part of my necessities.

But then, I realized Jonah was still holding onto the bag of 4 apples he had picked out.  He is on an apple craze.  My money was run out.  I promised my Beloved that I wouldn't go over $50.  I already used the $10 in cash that I got from selling an item on Craigslist just that morning on a birthday present.

I couldn't take those apples away from Jonah.  He was so excited while picking them out.  He sniffed and kissed each one before putting them in the bag.

Since I had already paid for everything by the time I found out about those apples, I can't believe I seriously thought about just "forgetting" they were there and walking out of the store with them.  I can't do that!  I'm supposed to be a Christian.  But I DO NOT want to take them away from my child.  He deserves to have his apples.

I went to the woman who oversees all the "self checkout" items and told her about my oversight on the apples.  I told her that maybe I could pay for them with the change in my wallet.  Two quarters, several dimes, and about ten pennies.  Maybe a nickel was thrown in there for good measure.  All four apples rang up as only $1.88.  Whooo!  I should be able to afford that.  Right?  After counting up my change ("Sorry, Jeremiah.  You won't be getting your allowance this week"), I had a little over one dollar.  I asked her to take out two of those smelled and kissed apples, and I had just enough to cover it.

I HATE MONEY.  All it does is show you what you're not able to afford, even when it is a good thing for  your child.  Jeremiah saw the yarn he helped me pick out discarded on the table beside the checkout counter and asked me why I wasn't getting it.  Trying to explain... Food is way more important than buying yarn.

I don't have a moral to this story.  This is my heartache right now.  Maybe I'm just being too emotional for other reasons.  I have never had to count pennies and take something out of my cart before.  This isn't about my ego or pride.  The only thing I want (and I know it is the same desire of my Beloved) is to provide for my family all the good and healthy and fun things in life.  It shouldn't be this difficult.

Reminder:  God will provide all we need.

I guess we only needed two apples today.  And we will get more of what we need tomorrow.  And the day after that.  For all the days of our life.

Until next time, remember that God loves you and is always near.

Preparing Him for the Other Woman by Sheri Rose Shepherd

While I was pregnant, after being married to my Beloved for six months (and only having known him for six months prior to that), I realized I wasn't ready to be a mother.  Well, actually, I knew that before I got pregnant, but that is part of what happens when you compromise during marriage.  I couldn't pray for a certain gender, I could only pray I wouldn't mess up my child.  I knew, from experience, the power a mother has on her children... especially a mother who stays at home full-time and homeschools.

The first several months after my son was born were extremely difficult.  I was struggling through post-partum depression without the help of medication.  I couldn't bond with my child.  There was nothing about motherhood that pleased me.  I didn't like breastfeeding.  I wasn't getting any sleep.  I couldn't understand why all the other mothers I saw and spoke to expressed joy about this "job" of being a mother.

Then my son started smiling when he saw me.  He started talking to me.  He wanted to play games.  He preferred me to his Daddy.  Only I could get him to stop crying and comfort him.  He was the quintessential Mama's boy (and still is).

Then I got pregnant again.  I fervently prayed for another boy.  I knew two boys could only quadruple the fun I was having with Jeremiah.  But Jonah... my sweet Jonah.  He is the opposite of his brother.  He is rough and tumble, wrestle and yell, Daddy's boy all the way.  He has just begun to realize, though, the importance of Mommy and is giving kisses and hugs now.

This just shows the importance of a mother's role in the lives of her children.  The way my husband treats me is indicative of how his parents raised him.  How I raise my boys is how they will treat their wives and children, also.  Everything is passed down.

My oldest son (as I am sure every mother has experienced) asked me if I could marry him.  I told him that, unfortunately, I couldn't since I was already married to his Daddy.  I explained that when he got older, he would find a nice girl that he loved and he would get to marry her and have his own house and children with her.  But when I saw his eyes tearing up and his lip trembling, I quickly added that it wouldn't happen for a really long time and only when he was ready.

Oh, the tender hearts of our boys.  They aren't men, yet.  We are training them up to be men.  Courageous and strong.  Adventurous and bold.  But also tenderhearted and loving.

How do we teach them all these important characteristics?

The book I have been reading by Sheri Rose Shepherd called "Preparing Him for the Other Woman" gives a lot of suggestions on how to build character and prepare them for marriage.

The introduction explains the commodity of men fighting for their families.  The epidemic of divorce in our society only proves that people (men and women, both) do not know the meaning of "till death do us part".  They have not been taught how to work together and MAKE their marriage work.  How to compromise.  How to understand and communicate with their spouse.

We need to teach our boys what a "real man" is.  In a world where boys grow up having a relationship with their video games, ipods, televisions and computers... where does family come in?  Even pornography is no longer such a dirty secret that embroils shame.  It is a coming of age ritual and entertainment.

Our boys need to have a role model (preferably, their fathers) that stands against immorality and infidelity.  Someone who will live a godly, self-controled life who is a strong and loving leader.

There is more to come in this excellent book.

Until next time, pray for your sons.  Pray that you and your husband (or another role model) will provide  your son with a good example.