Summertime

Every summer, my goal is the same.  Rest. Have fun with the boys.  Stay in town.  This years is no different.  We are not taking music classes in Waunakee which cuts down on travel time (40 minutes each way) and we are staying around the house and finding things to do within biking and walking distance.

The boys, yes both, are taking swimming lessons.  This is a huge deal, especially for the older, who is afraid of the water.  He has progressed tremendously and was dunked (by me) several times without getting hysterical.  Jonah is just having fun.  Learning safety in the water and so proud of himself for kicking and blowing bubbles.  He has never had trouble getting his face wet.

Next week, Jeremiah starts soccer practice.  He really wanted to be on track so he could run, but our community sports does not offer it... so soccer was his backup plan.  I am so excited to see how he deals with the team and coach aspect and running a lot in the heat.  He can be a wimp sometimes.  :-)

My own personal goal this summer is to ride my bike everywhere we go, while pulling the boys behind me.  Serves a few purposes.  One, saving gas money and two, probably the most important for me, losing weight.  I went a whole week riding my bike, except for the large shopping trip and dropping off huge boxes.  But everything else--swim lessons, library visits, general errands around town-- were completed using my bike.  The boys are having lots of fun with this new aspect of summer transportation.

I will try to track my progress here on the blog.

Current weight: 230

My Son, my Firstborn

My child had a birthday last Saturday.  He is five.  The wonder of being able to hold up an entire hand of fingers and say, "I'm five, you know."  He said he feels bigger and stronger and absolutely better about everything because he's five now... and it only happened a little while ago.

He is the brainy child.  He is my intellectual.  Watching nature all around him.  Naming all the different kinds of birds, insects, trees, flowers and fish... who ever wanted to know all those?  But he can tell you... and takes great delight in surprising you with his knowledge.

My boy wanted a superhero party.  Last year, it was a cake picnic with four different kinds of cake.  This year he wanted a strawberry cake... which turned out his favorite color:  PINK.  Adding blue piping around the edges and a Happy Birthday Jeremiah with multi-colored sprinkles and candles made it absolutely perfect.

He and his three friends ran all over the playground pretending to build a cake from sticks and sand and played house and chased each other.  Miss Elizabeth (aka.. Mrs. Spiderman) said Jeremiah could be her husband for the day.

My boy, who looks just like his Daddy and Poppy, who was induced ten days early and caused me 36 hours of labor, four hours of pushing and attempting to come out forehead first, is now five years old.

Happy birthday, Mr. Moo.

Fighting Fair

Rather than just sticking to the facts and make yet another article about how to resolve conflict and fight appropriately with your significant other, I will share a personal anecdote of our last fight.

It started well before the words started flying.  Doesn't it always?  I mean, what actually started the argument was something so stupid.  He interrupts me.  I hate that.  It wasn't just this one time, it is a consistent pattern and I was already "up to here" with it.  He sat down beside me to discuss our finances, which lately is a rather sticky topic anyway.  Every time I opened my mouth to say something, I was unable to finish.  And rather indelicately, I began yelling at him because, if you recall, I was "up to here" about it.

Naturally, my Beloved assumed I was getting angry because of the topic of discussion (which I wasn't... honestly) and things naturally progressed from there and he started yelling at me, getting really close to my face and, horror of horrors, touched my face while he was yelling two inches from me.  Well, that just blew my lid off... he better NOT touch me when he's angry because that just highlights my distrust of anyone when I am in that situation.

Then came the mocking and laughing and taunting and "I'm stronger than you are" which doesn't allow me to have any space to calm down and think rationally.  What to do?

If you're sticking to the "how to fight fair" topic, we both failed miserably for several reasons.  First, we have very opposing views on what is acceptable during a fight, which (even at this time) are unresolved; but even more than that, of those things which we can agree upon, we lost our cools collectively and let things get really personal and started yelling.

Recently, a friend of mine helped me think of a picture that will help me keep myself reined in when being provoked.  My picture to help me (which is different for everyone) is that of a board room to keep the professionalism present.  I was raised in a sterile environment and was not encouraged to use or express any emotion and when I worked in the outside world (as opposed to being a stay-at-home mom), I was quite comfortable with my role as an employee and showing decorum in a professional setting.  You would never yell and scream at your boss, right?

Anyway, the board room in my head will be attended by our two sweet boys.  If I have my children watching, I will be so much more motivated to watch what I say to their father and how I say it.  Keeping things in a quiet tone are supposed to help keep things calm rather than heightening everything.  That is my goal.  If we can actually do that and talk about our issues at the same time, BONUS POINTS.  Most likely, though, it will just be a segue into setting a time to discuss the initial topic later when we're both ready for it.

My goal before our next big fight, which is scheduled for sometime early next year (possibly between February and April 2013), is to study and learn different tools to help me, at the very least, keep my end of our "fight" sterile and calm.  Learning to use my tools can only happen if I have tools to begin with.

Until next time, keep the peace as much as is possible with you and learn to "fight fairly" for the sake of others.

Meat Loaf Patties with Pan Gravy

It seems like I have been cooking things I really don't care for lately, but I am convinced if I can find that superstar recipe there will be absolutely nothing my family and I don't like.  I guess it doesn't always hold true, but meat loaf is another one of my nemeses.  Don't like.  Don't want to.

I did, however, find a recipe that makes the meat loaf bearable.  It is a little involved, but really quite easy.

Meat loaf patties

1 1/3 lean ground sirloin (or just regular beef, as I used)

3 T. bread crumbs

1/8 cup milk (just a splash)
1 egg, beaten
2 tsp. grill seasoning blend

1 rounded T. tomato paste

1 med., finely chopped onion (reserve 1/4)

Place ground sirloin into large mixing bowl and create a well in the center.  Fill with bread crumbs and dampen with milk.  Pour egg over bread crumbs and add grill seasoning, tomato paste and 3/4 of the onion.  Mix until combined.  Form into four large oval patties (or as many smaller ones as you wish).

Pan fry meat loaf patties in a nonstick skillet over medium-high heat 7 minutes on each side under a loose tin foil tent.  This reflects the heat and allows steam to escape.  Removie patties to a platter and follow recipe for the gravy.

Three-condiment Pan Gravy

Pan drippings from meat loaf

2 T. butter

1/4 onion (reserved from meat loaf recipe)

2 T. flour

1 - 1 1/2 beef stock

1 T. ketchup

1 T. steak sauce

1 rounded tsp. spicy brown mustard

After removing patties from skillet, add butter and onion to pan drippings and reduce heat.  Cook for two minutes, then sprinkle with flour (watch carefully to not burn up drippings).  Cook for another minute, then whisk in one cup of beef stock.  Bring to a bubble.  If gravy is too thick, add stock.  Stir in ketchup, steak sauce and mustard.  Remove from heat and drizzle over meat loaf patties.

Serve with mashed potatoes drenched with the gravy and your favorite green vegetable.

A Brisket (or roast)

One of my least favorite things to eat has been any kind of roast.  The taste is dry and has a "roast-y" flavor I have never enjoyed.  It ends up rolling around in my mouth, chewing and chewing and then a big wad in the side of my cheek that never gets swallowed.

My Beloved husband has always loved a good roast, however, and in trying to be a model wife I have searched out recipes I thought he would enjoy and hoped I might be able to tolerate.  The following recipe is one I found in my Jewish cookbook for brisket.  Since I didn't have a brisket, I swapped it out for a chuck roast.  In serving it for our shabbat meal, even I had to say that I really and truly enjoyed it.  It was tender, falling off the bone, and for the standard "roast-y" taste, the sauce covered it up and made it into an almost bar-b-que flavor.

Try it out!

Beef brisket (or a chuck roast)

1 (10-ounce) bottle teriyaki sauce

1 envelope dry onion soup mix
2 tablespoons brown sugar

Place the brisket in a baking pan (or I used a crockpot).  Cover with ketchup and pour entire bottle of teriyaki sauce over it.  Pour onion soup mix on top of meat and sprinkle over it with brown sugar.  Cover and bake at 350 degrees (2 1/2 hours for 7 pounds of meat) (for about 2 to 3 pounds, cook for about 1 hour).  In a crockpot with about 2 to 3 pounds of chuck roast, as I used, cook on low for about six hours.

Please note, a brisket takes longer to cook than a roast, so make sure you account for that.

Do Politics Matter?

Have you heard the retort, "Well, this world is gonna burn, anyway!"?  I know I have.  And, I would have to say that until yesterday I had a very apathetic attitude about politics and how our government works.  Yes, I had a big day yesterday.

Our church has missions' month every March and one of our speakers (three years in a row, now), was Julaine Appling, a strong-minded, clear orater about the importance of legislating values.  Now, don't get me wrong... I am all for getting "good" laws passed into our system; it just hasn't seemed likely or possible.  What I realized yesterday was that it takes regular people, like myself, to change laws.  It takes one or two people to make a phone call to their representatives.  It takes one or two people to share their thoughts with like-minded friends who will then share the passion to get things changed to better our own lives.

God has been priming me, I think, for a little while by sending messages via Facebook and email through friends who are passionate (maybe?) about certain causes.  One of them was a 30-minute video talking about how parental rights are being violated.  That caused me to sit up and take notice for once.  I am a mother.  That is my job.  I value being able to make decisions for my children that I deem "in their best interest".  What if that was taken away from me?  It already is.  People around our country have experienced it.  Being arrested for not wanting your child to have "Sexual Tolerance" teaching in Kindergarten, being court-ordered by a judge that you are only allowed to take your child to church one service a week, being told by a family physician that you must get permission from your underage child for the results of a drug test YOU paid for.

IT IS HAPPENING.  TODAY.  In our Free and Liberated Country.

So, what are you going to do about it?

Sitting in church, hearing Ms. Appling talk about her role in Wisconsin Family Council and realizing that you CAN and SHOULD legislate morality was eye-opening.  Everyone else is making laws based on what they believe is right, why not me??

Were they legislating morality when they legalized gay marriage?  YES!
Were they legislating morality when they legalized abortion? YES!

The candidates you want to put into office are those that closely mirror your values and beliefs when it comes to upholding marriage and family.  If your candidate does not have those in line, nothing else they try to fix (jobs, economy, etc) will turn out properly.

God puts up kings and takes them down.  He has given each country and people their own set of government and laws.  Ours is a republic (or was)... and is so close to being ruined.  It is our responsibility to keep things the way God intended until He decides to "let it burn".

If we aren't legislating our biblical ethics and morality, it will be someone else's views and opinions.  Stand up and start talking!

Until next time, review the issues in your area and get ready to VOTE!

Does He Really Care about Apples?

I have struggled getting back into my writing groove since the holidays.  So much tends to keep me preoccupied with other things... like life.  Homeschooling my children, grocery shopping, budgeting and seeing how much money I can't spend.

It was a little disconcerting this morning.  I went to the store with my two helpers and I had a list of items I "had" to get for food and was under orders by my Beloved to spend no more than $50.  I thought No problem.  My list isnt' that long.  The thing is... I failed to think of how many of each item I was going to purchase.  After buying three orange juices (since my boys guzzle it down so quickly), two cereals, two canned mushrooms, a bag of chocolate chips (for those cookies we're going to make), two bags of Doritos, two packages of butter, salad dressing, two loaves of bread and some fishy crackers for the boys, I had used up all my allotted money.

I had picked out some yarn for the new afghan I wanted to make (three skeins at $2.88 each) and a booklet of some patterns since I'm still new to the world of crotcheting and need some help.  I put those back since they weren't part of my necessities.

But then, I realized Jonah was still holding onto the bag of 4 apples he had picked out.  He is on an apple craze.  My money was run out.  I promised my Beloved that I wouldn't go over $50.  I already used the $10 in cash that I got from selling an item on Craigslist just that morning on a birthday present.

I couldn't take those apples away from Jonah.  He was so excited while picking them out.  He sniffed and kissed each one before putting them in the bag.

Since I had already paid for everything by the time I found out about those apples, I can't believe I seriously thought about just "forgetting" they were there and walking out of the store with them.  I can't do that!  I'm supposed to be a Christian.  But I DO NOT want to take them away from my child.  He deserves to have his apples.

I went to the woman who oversees all the "self checkout" items and told her about my oversight on the apples.  I told her that maybe I could pay for them with the change in my wallet.  Two quarters, several dimes, and about ten pennies.  Maybe a nickel was thrown in there for good measure.  All four apples rang up as only $1.88.  Whooo!  I should be able to afford that.  Right?  After counting up my change ("Sorry, Jeremiah.  You won't be getting your allowance this week"), I had a little over one dollar.  I asked her to take out two of those smelled and kissed apples, and I had just enough to cover it.

I HATE MONEY.  All it does is show you what you're not able to afford, even when it is a good thing for  your child.  Jeremiah saw the yarn he helped me pick out discarded on the table beside the checkout counter and asked me why I wasn't getting it.  Trying to explain... Food is way more important than buying yarn.

I don't have a moral to this story.  This is my heartache right now.  Maybe I'm just being too emotional for other reasons.  I have never had to count pennies and take something out of my cart before.  This isn't about my ego or pride.  The only thing I want (and I know it is the same desire of my Beloved) is to provide for my family all the good and healthy and fun things in life.  It shouldn't be this difficult.

Reminder:  God will provide all we need.

I guess we only needed two apples today.  And we will get more of what we need tomorrow.  And the day after that.  For all the days of our life.

Until next time, remember that God loves you and is always near.

Preparing Him for the Other Woman by Sheri Rose Shepherd

While I was pregnant, after being married to my Beloved for six months (and only having known him for six months prior to that), I realized I wasn't ready to be a mother.  Well, actually, I knew that before I got pregnant, but that is part of what happens when you compromise during marriage.  I couldn't pray for a certain gender, I could only pray I wouldn't mess up my child.  I knew, from experience, the power a mother has on her children... especially a mother who stays at home full-time and homeschools.

The first several months after my son was born were extremely difficult.  I was struggling through post-partum depression without the help of medication.  I couldn't bond with my child.  There was nothing about motherhood that pleased me.  I didn't like breastfeeding.  I wasn't getting any sleep.  I couldn't understand why all the other mothers I saw and spoke to expressed joy about this "job" of being a mother.

Then my son started smiling when he saw me.  He started talking to me.  He wanted to play games.  He preferred me to his Daddy.  Only I could get him to stop crying and comfort him.  He was the quintessential Mama's boy (and still is).

Then I got pregnant again.  I fervently prayed for another boy.  I knew two boys could only quadruple the fun I was having with Jeremiah.  But Jonah... my sweet Jonah.  He is the opposite of his brother.  He is rough and tumble, wrestle and yell, Daddy's boy all the way.  He has just begun to realize, though, the importance of Mommy and is giving kisses and hugs now.

This just shows the importance of a mother's role in the lives of her children.  The way my husband treats me is indicative of how his parents raised him.  How I raise my boys is how they will treat their wives and children, also.  Everything is passed down.

My oldest son (as I am sure every mother has experienced) asked me if I could marry him.  I told him that, unfortunately, I couldn't since I was already married to his Daddy.  I explained that when he got older, he would find a nice girl that he loved and he would get to marry her and have his own house and children with her.  But when I saw his eyes tearing up and his lip trembling, I quickly added that it wouldn't happen for a really long time and only when he was ready.

Oh, the tender hearts of our boys.  They aren't men, yet.  We are training them up to be men.  Courageous and strong.  Adventurous and bold.  But also tenderhearted and loving.

How do we teach them all these important characteristics?

The book I have been reading by Sheri Rose Shepherd called "Preparing Him for the Other Woman" gives a lot of suggestions on how to build character and prepare them for marriage.

The introduction explains the commodity of men fighting for their families.  The epidemic of divorce in our society only proves that people (men and women, both) do not know the meaning of "till death do us part".  They have not been taught how to work together and MAKE their marriage work.  How to compromise.  How to understand and communicate with their spouse.

We need to teach our boys what a "real man" is.  In a world where boys grow up having a relationship with their video games, ipods, televisions and computers... where does family come in?  Even pornography is no longer such a dirty secret that embroils shame.  It is a coming of age ritual and entertainment.

Our boys need to have a role model (preferably, their fathers) that stands against immorality and infidelity.  Someone who will live a godly, self-controled life who is a strong and loving leader.

There is more to come in this excellent book.

Until next time, pray for your sons.  Pray that you and your husband (or another role model) will provide  your son with a good example.